Tags
Books, Borderline, Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD, Depression, Personality Disorders, PS4, Super Nintendo, Video Games
I was just diagnosed this year with Borderline Personality Disorder. Or BPD.
A lot of things make sense now, why my emotions are so unstable and on a daily basis. A diagnosis such as this does give you knowledge and power but it can be very overwhelming in fact for the past week I have had anxiety attacks every single day.
But I have also had crying fits, moments of rage, moments of pure sadness, and moments of joy.
Video games are helping me keep my focus on something. Right now I have a Super Nintendo. I am hoping to get a PS4 in December. Though I will always, always play my Super Nintendo. I want to start buying some more games for it too. Right now I have Mario World, Mario Kart, Donkey Kong 1, 2, and 3, NFL Madden 94′, Mario Paint, and I think that is it.
Yesterday after having an episode were I threw a pile of magazines across the room against the room (makes me sick inside that I did that), I play my Super Nintendo and was able to “come back”, as my parents call it, it is like I go somewhere else in my episodes, it is rather terrifying, I feel like I am possessed, and I am trapped in there right along side and I am fighting to be me, but something just is fighting harder than me,
Yesterday I ordered three books, I think they are going to be great reads. One is a memoir that sounds so interesting, another is a book for BPD people and their families, and another a workbook that looks like it will definitely keep me busy (what I need), here are their titles:
“Loud in the House of Myself: Memoir of a Strange Girl” by Stacy Pershall
“The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation & Tolearance” by Matthew McKay, Jeffrey C. Wood and Jeffrey Brantley
The book for families is the following–> “Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder: A Family Guide for Healing and Change” by Valerie Porr
I am so thankful to have a supportive friend and parents. My parents support me through all of this.
Feeling a little off today. My head just feels full of thoughts. Might try to play some games to focus my mind.
For all those with borderline…
My So-Called Life 
It’s amazing to hear that you’ve found something to deal with your disorder. It’s even more amazing that it’s video games!
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Hi Rocco! Thanks for your comment on my blog post! Yes video games are definitely helping me. Made a permanent spot last night in my room for Super Nintendo. Do you game? Any thoughts on buying the PS4? Thanks again.
Amber =)
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Amber, I do game & I actually own a PS4. I think you would enjoy picking one up. I’m sure you can find some games that you’ll really enjoy.
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I am thrilled at all of the progress that you’ve made in such a short time. A new diagnosis stirs so many emotions in there, especially when a person such as yourself experiences so many of them in such a small window.
I was more curious to ask you about your experience with BPD. I’d love to ask you some questions, if you are comfortable answering them.
Keep up the wonderful work. Sometimes, conventional therapy just isn’t enough. I practice martial arts as a part of my own therapy 🙂 Whatever works!
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Hello Lulu~ Thank you very much for your lovely comment. Feel free to ask me anything. If you want to ask me in private I could give you an e-mail if you want to swap e-mails. Martial arts, very neat! Yes whatever works, and exercise like activities definitely work, I start physical therapy tonight, going to be doing aquatic and land PT. Hope to hear from you again. -Amber =)
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